The Last One
by Koritsune Dragonrider
Summary: Songfic. What happens when you're the last person who cares?


**Disclaimers: I don't own the characters and the song **_**Where Once Was Light (Gollum's Song)**_** belongs to the people who wrote it and sung by Emiliana Torrini.**

**The Last One**

_*Where once was light_

_Now darkness falls*_

I walked down the grove slowly. I didn't really want to go where I was heading but I had to, to clear a conscious that had too long been grieving, that had too long been guilty that I wasn't with them.

I shivered as I walk down the row of names. They never changed. Nothing's changed. Only I've changed. Why is it so dark? Where's the light? It used to be right next to me, the light, but know it's gone. Where's the light?

_*Where once was love_

_Love is no more*_

I felt empty for too long. Why do I feel empty? It's been too long since I've felt completed. Why don't I feel whole anymore? Why do I feel like an empty shell that's lost its soul.

I stop briefly to watch the sakura petals fall around me, some falling in my white hair or my pale shoulders. I don't bother brushing them off. Why bother? I'm just a shell, a link in the pattern of fate. But why did fate take them away from me and let me live? I'm just a wandering shell now, unloved and alone.

_*Don't say - goodbye_

_Don't say - I didn't try*_

I reached your places. Amazing how they're set up in a row, nice and neat. I visit _her_ too every once in a while but you guys are the hardest to see. The hurt, the pain, it all comes back every time I see you. But I keep coming back! Why?! Because of guilt? A guilty conscious? Is that that why I don't want to let go? Let go of the past, to who I was? Is that it?

I slowly trace your names and the RIPs underneath.

_Urameshi Yusuke, beloved friend, husband, and hero._

_Kuwabara Kazuma, beloved friend, husband and hero._

_Jaganshi Hiei, beloved friend and hero._

There was nothing more that said how you sacrificed yourself to save their world. Hiei was right, ningen's are stupid. Underneath was something I scratched in. I traced my hands over the rough writing. _World's greatest friends._

_*These tears we cry are falling rain_

_For all the lies you told us_

_The hurt, the blame!*_

I didn't notice I was crying. I do that a lot since you guys left. Some people mistake my tears as raindrops because they fall so hard. And once I start I can't stop. I can't stop! I just cry for hours till my eyes hurt, my nose hurts and runs and my mouth harsh from my wails. As always my clothes would be soaked when I pass out from exhaustion. I don't want to cry anymore! Someone, make me stop!

_*And we will weep_

_To be so alone*_

You said we would make it out together, you lucky fool! You said we would be okay! But we aren't okay! You're gone and I'm a wondering spirit who can't find anything to sooth my aching soul. Everything hurts now that you're gone! I don't know if I can last long with this aching void where my heart would be. I had been split in thirds when you left and you took the pieces with you. I'm just a shell.

_*We are lost!_

_We can never go home*_

I wandered everywhere but to always return here. Finally I just stayed here, waiting for my time to join you. How long has it been? How long since you've been gone? A thousand, two thousand, years? Enma and all the gods above, it can't have been that long! When will I join you and rest of my friends? I just want to die. Someone, help me! I'm lost!

_*So in the end_

_I will be - what I will be*_

My voice is harsh now from crying, my nose and eyes are sour too. How long have I been crying? I look up to see the sun about to set and knew I've been crying half the day. I can't stop crying! This is who I am now. I've lost everything when you left. No one's there for me now. I have no friends, just graves of the dead people I knew. Dead and moved on. I want to move on!

_*No loyal friend_

_Was ever there for me*_

I know you tried to make us all get out alive but when you went down first me and the others went back after you. How stupid we were. The other two went down before I was hit, but I was the only one who woke up again. I know you tried to get us out of there, Tantei. And we tried to save you knowing it was impossible. I won't say you didn't try.

_*Now we say - goodbye_

_We say - you didn't try*_

I know it is too late to cry, to mourn for someone long gone but I can't stop! Every time I think of you guys I can't help but cry, I'm mourning for friends long gone! If _he_ was here he'd yell at me and call me stupid for crying over something as stupid as their deaths. The oaf and lucky fool would just let me cry or try and comfort me, I know the girls would. I want to stop crying!

_*These tears you cry_

_Have come too late*_

Oh Gods, it's my fault! I killed you and everyone else! The demon wanted me, me! They killed you while on the mission and I lead them to the girls! Why didn't I see it?! Why didn't I try to stop it?! I'm the one to blame! After all these years, thinking it was a simple, freak mission I was to blame! I killed them all! I killed my friends!

_*Take back the lies_

_The hurt, the blame!*_

I'm weeping again. Amazing that a person like me is weeping for something as meager as this. Water falling from my gold eyes and falling to land on my tunic or pants. I'm the last one, and it's my entire fault! I will always be alone, with no friends by my side. They're all gone because of me. I'll never find solace in this life, no serenity or compassion. I want to go home! I know I can't, but I want to go home!

_*And you will weep_

_When you face the end alone*_

(Normal POV)

Unknown to the kitsune, ten people stood transparent behind him, proving all his doubts wrong. They were always there for him, even after all those years. They stayed by his side and nothing could make them leave what held them to that plane. Not even all those ferry girls coming to collect them could make them budge from what connected them to where they called home. Now they stayed to watch as the last one faded away, drowned in doubt and misery of long years of loneliness, pain, quilt, and torment. The last one has left.

_*You are lost!_

_You can never go home*_

Of all the doubts Kurama felt, they agreed on one thing. They can never go home.

***You are lost**

**You can never go home***

**It took me days to finish this, and I'm crying as I write it. I listened to the song the whole time I was writing to get the feel of it and I think I really captured it. R&R please!**


End file.
